London Wedding Planner

Last week I offered my advice on how to get started with your wedding planning , and as part of my ‘newly engaged’ series today I want to talk about what I actually do on a day-to-day basis. If you’re thinking about whether or not you need a wedding planner, or you know you need help but are worried about handing the arrangements over to a third party, hopefully this will help you make a more informed decision.

If I had a pound for every time someone said to me “you’re a wedding planner – like in the film” I’d be a wealthy woman. Despite the fact that the number of wedding planners in the UK is higher than ever and an increasing number of brides are using a planner to help with at least some, if not all, of their arrangements, sadly there still seems to be a huge amount of mystery surrounding our work. No, I won’t run off with the groom, and no I don’t wear a headset on the wedding day (you wouldn’t believe how many times I get asked that one!). And yes, there is more to my job than tasting cakes and looking at pretty dresses.

Now I completely understand why new brides might be wondering what on earth a wedding planner does. Let’s be honest, people have been planning their own weddings for generations without professional assistance, so why the sudden need to get someone else on board? But did they have to fit it around busy full-time careers, living away from their families, looking after a young family and a hectic social life? Probably not.

What upsets me most, however, is a continued lack of understanding within the industry itself. The majority of suppliers and venues I meet are brilliant to work with, but occasionally I have to work with people who clearly think I’m a complete waste of space and have no problem in making their point. That is until they watch me run around for 10 or 12 hours on a wedding day, and then they usually change their mind.

Some venues have even refused to even let me view their premises on account that “we don’t work with wedding planners, we have our own co-ordinator”. Of course you do, but will that co-ordinator negotiate the best deal for her brides with all of her suppliers, contact guests who haven’t RSVPd by the deadline, help her finalise her wedding design and find those all-important finishing touches, or be on call for the entire wedding day to sort out any problems? I’m sorry, but I think not. And that’s understandable, because they have dozens of brides to work with and it would be impossible to dedicate the required amount of time to all of them.

This is where someone like me comes in. If I wrote a list of all the different things I do for just one client I’d still be writing it next week! Now I’m not going to give you a tedious inventory of all the ways in which I can help a bride plan her wedding, but I would like to share with you some of my dos and don’ts, which will hopefully dispel some of the myths surrounding the wonderful industry in which I work.

.
I Do…

- meet with any prospective client for a no-obligation consultation
You wouldn’t hire a photographer without seeing their work, so why would you hire a wedding planner without meeting them. I work very closely with my brides and often end up becoming good friends with them, so before you make a booking it’s important that you like me, trust me and feel that I understand your vision of your wedding day

-  offer a completely flexible service
Not everyone wants a planner to take care of everything, which is why I offer lots of different options. However, these aren’t set in stone. The services outlined on my website are there to give you an idea of the possibilities, but I always like to tailor the extent of my involvement to the needs of each individual client

- provide a friendly ear to talk to
I’m not just here to recommend suppliers, talk budgets and keep track of timings. This is a really special day for you, and there are lots of different emotions flying around for everyone involved. If you want to share your concerns or worries with me, or you just need to vent your anger that your best friend has turned out to be a nightmare bridesmaid, I’m always at the end of a phone or e-mail

- stay in constant contact throughout the planning process
This is your day, not mine, so you’re the one in control. And in order for that to be the case you need to know what’s going on. Which is why I’m always talking with my brides to let them know what I’ve been up to, where we are with the planning and what’s happening next. Even if there’s a lull for a few weeks, I’ll still you drop an e-mail to say hello

- try to negotiate the best possible quote from suppliers
Part of my job is to get you the best suppliers for the best price. Many of my trusted suppliers offer discounts for my clients, meaning that you can effectively recoup some, if not all, of the fee you’ve paid for my services. I can’t promise you’ll save hundreds or thousands of pounds, but I will do my best for you

- listen to you
My job is all about listening. Listening to your ideas, the things you like, the things you don’t want, what’s most important to you, what you’re worried about, etc. Only by listening to you can I understand what you’re looking for, and only then can I set about making it happen

- give you my honest opinion
I won’t ever tell you your ideas are rubbish, but I will tell you if something isn’t going to work or if what you’re trying to do isn’t feasible for your budget. You’ve hired me to give you my professional advice, so there’s no point me going along with everything only for you to go massively over budget or end up with a mismatched wedding that you’re disappointed with

- get excited about your wedding
I live and breathe weddings. Cliched I know, but it’s true (just ask my husband!). That means I just can’t help but get excited about my client’s plans and ideas. I love working on their designs and helping them incorporate their personalities into their day, but most of all seeing it come together at the end of months of hard work. There’s nothing better than when a bride turns to me and says “this is just what I wanted”. For me that’s a job well done

.
I Don’t…

- take any commission from venues or suppliers
This is part of the code of ethics I adhere to as set out by the UK Alliance of Wedding Planners ( UKAWP ). I charge my clients a fee for my service, and I don’t expect to use offers of commission as a way of making more money. This ensures I only recommend suppliers and venues on merit, not because one of them is slipping me an extra £100 for using them. Any offers of commission will always be passed directly to you

- take over your wedding planning
Depending on how much you want me to do I will make suggestions, offer advice, look after paperwork and handle correspondence with suppliers. However, I won’t tell you what to do, I won’t force you to have something you don’t want, and I won’t make you hire a supplier you don’t feel comfortable with. It’s your day, you call the shots

- tell suppliers how to do their job
Your suppliers are the experts. I don’t know how to make elaborate floral centrepieces, decorate a wedding cake or capture those all important memories on film, so I’m certainly not going to try and tell someone with umpteen years experience that I think they’re going about it the wrong way. I’m here to try and make your suppliers’ lives easier by informing them of what’s happening on the day, so that they can be in the right place at the right time, getting on with what you’ve hired them to do

- think I’m planning my own wedding all over again
I’ve been married 4 ½ years, and yes I loved planning my wedding and it’s one of the reasons I started working in the industry.  But I’ve had my big day and now I’m working for you. I love spending time with my brides and grooms, learning more about their likes and dislikes and finding ways of incorporating their personalities into their wedding day. Your wedding should be about you. Maybe I wouldn’t choose the same colour scheme as you if it was my wedding, but it isn’t so I’m not going to try and tell you otherwise

- hit you with a load of hidden charges
A real pet hate of mine is when suppliers and venues aren’t upfront about what is included in their quotation – travel, VAT, service, cloakroom staffing, extended hours, etc. I like to be completely transparent about my pricing. Right from the start you’ll know things like how much mileage is included in the fee and the number of meetings we’ll have. If there are likely to be any extras involved, such as bringing in an assistant on the day, I’ll tell you straight up how much that will cost

- act like a sergeant major on your wedding day
There is nothing worse for you or your guests than being ordered around military fashion. On the day I’ll be working predominantly in the background to make sure everything is going according to plan. I’ll be visible if your suppliers or guests need me, but I’ll be discreet, and if there are any little hiccups you’ll probably never know about them because I’ll deal with them without any fuss or drama
.

If you are thinking about hiring a wedding planner I hope you’ve found this information useful. However, if you have unanswered questions or concerns about what hiring a planner means for you, please do get in touch as I’d be happy to talk with you in more detail. Next week I’ll be sharing the important things to look for when hiring a wedding planner, along with the key questions to ask at an initial consultation.

.
Photo Credits:
Stressed out bride: The Village Hearth
Bridal preparations and clients: Charles Cielo

You might also find interesting:

• Wedding Planner Q&A – Inviting Work Colleagues
• How To Choose a Wedding Planner
• Wedding Planner Q&A – Unhelpful Bridesmaid
• Wedding Planner Q&A: Inviting Divorced Parents